You’ve heard the term ‘baby brain’ or ‘pregnancy brain’ right? I had too but I also refused to believe that it was real. I thought it was some creative excuse for fatigue-related forgetfulness, or even just a development of apathy for things that seemed to matter before and perhaps seem less important now. Hey man, no judgement and all – but don’t just make up a term for this thing that’s not real and try to trick the rest of us. Cool? Okay.
I am incredibly vain about my intellect and prefer to keep it as sharp as possible. I like to think I’m smart – and am simultaneously incredibly insecure that I’m not smart. My pre-preganancy self would often make mindful decisions to keep my brain functioning optimally – including frequently making the choice to avoid drinking or the use of marijuana because of the lame-brain hangover effect. I noticed these substances notably dampening my cognitive process so much the next day that the loss of productivity became a huge deterrent for me.
But here I am now… this grey fog has taken residence where my brain once was, and has dimmed my ability to process. Baby Brain. It’s incredibly real, and very humbling. In one week I didn’t show up for 3 different appointments – get this guys – because I FORGOT. I didn’t show up to a yoga class. That I TEACH. Because I FORGOT. Wut.
I didn’t even realize that this was a reason you don’t show up to something. Slept in? It happens. Traffic? Sure. Family emergency? Of course. But just straight up don’t remember you’re supposed to be somewhere? Never.
What’s that you say? Put it in your calendar? Well I would – but I keep FORGETTING to do that. And if I am lucky enough to put it in there. I’ll forget to check the damn calendar. It’s a fascinating development.
Gotta tell you though. As mortified as I have been not showing up for these various appointments – there are some perks to my newly acquired state of dullness.
I could swear I worry less. Actually, I know I worry less, probably because I forget half my problems. I can’t keep a running tally of everything that’s going on at all times… which would usually cause me more anxiety – but my brain also can’t keep up with caring either right now. So I just don’t. Being stupid is SO GREAT.
I had no idea this was what I was missing out on. Here I’m all worried about how my lack of brain function would impact my work, goals, and ambitions… but no, this is rad. The other day I even forgot to eat until my guts were attacking me from the inside.
WAIT. WHAT. So you’re saying that this brain shift means I could care less, worry less, AND be really skinny because I also forget to eat. I love this.
Being dumber is FUN. Why have I spent so much effort trying to educate and enlighten myself when NOT knowing is the most relaxed I’ve felt in years. I can just leave all the things that need to be done up to these other people with their shiny, sparkly brains. They’ve got it covered.
So yeah. The point of my sitting down to write this morning was actually to tell you all about some other aspects and shifts that have occurred in my pregnancy – but I forgot that, that’s what I was gunna write about… so whatevs.
In the mean time. #BabyBrainFTW